Thursdays Thoughts

I'm going to try every Thursday to do Thursday Thoughts. 

Hopefully I will be able to have enough things to say that I'll be able to right a blog post every Thursday but we'll see how it goes! 

1. Mental illness is a never ending battle 
2. I will try to stop defining myself as a person with mental illness
3. I want to let this blog be my outlet. To try and write down all of my thoughts and feelings so that I can go back to them a year from now and see how far I really have come in this battle 
4. Mental illness can be a beautiful thing 
5. Being judged.

1. This is pretty self explanatory. Mental illness is a never ending battle. A battle I will never stop fighting and a cause I will not stop fighting for. If one person took a minute of their day to listen to one thought a person with mental illness had, and actually listened to them, it could go a long way! 

2. Starting this blog, I realized I've been suppressing the thoughts of mental illness. I don't like to think of it that way! I like to think of it as I'm a normal person doing day-to-day activities and surviving and being happy. But some times that's not always the case. I use it as an excuse for a day I'm just not happy and I need to stop doing that. You're allowed to be unhappy some days or some days just not be up for anything. Mental illness is not an excuse! 

3. I know that over the past year I have changed a million times over. Not only by losing a 100 pounds and looking like a complete different person but also my thought process. I no longer think of it being weird that I'm an adult now. I'm an adult. That doesn't sound weird. I would love to see how my thought process changes from 24 to 25 as I take another step forward into adulthood. I want to be able to see all my thoughts and opinions and know those are my thoughts and opinions and not have anyone change them. That's a big issue for me personality wise. 

4. Today I watched an older episode of Extreme Weightloss (me and my roommate are big suckers for this show) where we met a lady named Jackie. Who became close to 130 pounds over weight because of emotional eating. When her son was 16 months old her nanny/caretaker shook her child which gave him serious brain damage. Although he was once blind, in a wheelchair and unable to have use of his hands, this now 17 year old boy can do all of those things. Mental illness can be a beautiful thing!

5. I don't want people to think that I think all mental illness is the same. I know its not. I know I don't have a very severe case of mental illness. That there aren't many out there more severe and others aren't harder to deal with. Absolutely it is and absolutely there are! I'm very fortunate. I know that. We all struggle and this blog is just an outlet for that. 

And since it is Thursday... 

a good #tbt never hurt anybody

..... well maybe it has lol

This was me Halloween a few years ago with my good friend Latiesha

vs.

The other day at the gym after a workout (don't mind the sweat)

I wouldn't change what I've been through for anything! It has gotten me to where I am today, and that is happy! 

With lots of love, 

Samantha